Outnumbered, Outgunned

Dream Last night

I had a dream last night that had woody allen ranting about how Anton Lavey was bad for satanism, and he was just a big fraud. Woody and I sitting in a room and some little mexican kid playing with a car, and my telling him to knock it all, calling him antonio.

I was pretty impressed with the fact that I spent the whole night on my bed, and have not slept on my couch in a few days. I dont know where that habit comes from, but I just assume that it is just a thing I picked up and rather than changing it, I keep going with it. I know that I dont like it.

My home swings from good to really really dirty in the course of an afternoon, and nothing and no one can change that. I just have to recover the differant peices like geography in a war. I have to reclaim the cupbord from itself. I just do.

I think so many people live there lives in reaction to other right now. I read these blog, and it seems like so much quoteing of hte newspaper in San Francisco or whatever. I should be quoting the Wausau daily herald...or the Austin Times Picayune. I mean what is the point of quoting some article about San Fran local issues. Were not in San Francisco...oh I guess it is the cute thing of man.

You know, I dont think man is cute. I dont think humanity and its issues are the things of pop culture. I dont think Newspapers are just kitsch. I look ath te the way some of us comment on these thing, our self centered crap, our pompous way of looking at hte world.

I dont like that. It makes me not want to read things like the things I read.

I dont honestly know what the point of my blog is yet, but I just dont want to live my life like a smarmy 17 year old mocking the teachers passion. That is what this is...were sitting in the back of the room, and laughing at the teacher for being passionate.

Its Dane Cole sitting in the back of the Chem lab with Dave Webber(both dead) mocking Bill Heeren for feeling the desire to teach passsionately. There rich parents bullshit rubbing off on them. There cool attitude, there unwillingness to engage the world passionately, there law school degrees in hand...there houses on pine island or east hill...engaging the world on some bullshit level.

Now I watch my generation be that generation. Running to east hill, running to the new volvo bmw vw saab bullshit mobile.

I mean who bought Norah Jones...my people. My age group. its all bullshit.

Do you see what passes for edgey in pop culture these days? I watch MTV from time to time...the arbiter of culture...and its Kelly Clarkson all hosed down. Like they could not even find a hottie to get wet. I mean was the edgey band on the MTV video music award fucking COLDPAY. OOH FREE TRADE. What the fuck.

Gone are the days of Nirvana and Pearl Jam and Guns and Roses.

The best we have to offer is Celine Dion nesting in Vegas. Elton John filling in for her when she needs a fill in.

I am just as guilty of this as anyone. I nest on the pop culture shit from time to time. For example right now I am working through season one of DEADWOOD from my friend Dicky Betts. But the cursing is amazing.

Speaking of Dicky Betts...his band is playing at Scott Street tonight. So that will be cool.

Posted by Radiofree at September 17, 2005 02:19 PM | TrackBack